A Shivim companion
The year before the mikveh
Not “convert in 90 days”. A companion for those studying toward conversion: learn, prepare questions, and do not improvise a status.
What you may learn
Studying is not claiming. These doors are open without anyone declaring you Jewish.
- Study
Humash, the 7 laws, the calendar, the history of Israel — to understand, not to “validate” a file.
- Visit a community
As a guest: listen, watch, ask. Without counting yourself in a minyan.
- Hebrew of Jewish life
Words of shul, kitchen, calendar. Listen and repeat — not a badge-hunting Duolingo.
- The calendar
Shabbat, festivals, fasts: know what the community around you is living.
- The 7 laws
The universal core remains yours until you are Jewish. Study does not replace it.
- The people and the covenant
Understand Israel from inside the texts, without substituting yourself for it.
What you must not yet claim
Learning a mitzvah does not let you wear it as a Jew. These lines keep you from wounding a community — and from lying to yourself.
- A “complete” Shabbat
You may study Shabbat. You may not say “I keep Shabbat” as a Jew — nor make a community treat you as one.
- Public berakhot
Learn the words, yes. Recite them aloud as a ḥiyuv, or in a Jew’s place, no.
- “I am Jewish”
Before the mikveh (and a beit din’s decision), that sentence is false. It is not an intermediate step.
- Counting in a minyan
A candidate is not the tenth. Ask the community how it receives you.
- Tefillin, tzitzit, an aliya
These are signs of covenant. Wearing them “to practice” in public confuses your status with Israel’s.
Questions a beit din really asks
To study these themes — not to prepare cheat-sheet answers, and not to play court.
Why do you want this — now?
Not a romantic story. What you are seeking, and what you are ready to lose.
What do you already live, concretely?
Not a checked list of mitzvot: a real week, with its gaps.
What becomes of those who live with you?
Spouse, children, parents: a beit din does not convert a domestic fiction.
Where do you pray, who knows you?
A file without a community is a file without witnesses of life.
What have you not said yet?
A hidden past comes out. Better to bring it yourself.
What do you understand you cannot yet claim?
Someone who already says “I am Jewish” often has not understood the process.
Hebrew of Jewish life
Shul, kitchen, calendar. Listen and repeat — do not collect lessons.
In chat, turn on hands-free (Premium) to hear and send the phrase back. Without it, Shivim can still have you repeat in writing.
Words you hear when you enter, leave, or after a reading.
שלום
Shalom
Peace; everyday greeting.
שבת שלום
Shabbat shalom
A Shabbat greeting — saying it is not “keeping” Shabbat yet.
ברוך הבא
Baruch haba
“Welcome” — they say it to you; it is not an aliya.
יישר כוח
Yasher koach
Well done / strength to you, after a mitzvah or a reading.
אמן
Amen
Answering a berakha. Answering is not saying it in a Jew’s place.
Finding a rav / a beit din — without a directory
We do not list courts. A site that does that for you decides too much. Here is how to look, carefully.
A community you can actually attend
Start with a place you can frequent. A rav who has never seen you cannot accompany you.
A rav who knows you
Ask the community, not a forum. The right person is the one who will see you over time.
Questions to ask them
Do they accompany candidates? Which beit din do they work with? How long, with no promised date?
Warning signs
“Online” conversion, a sold timeline, payment for a status, pressure to lie about your life. Walk away.
Time is not a bug
A year (often more) is not a humiliation. It is the opposite of a 90-day program.
Why this page exists
Community sites speak to those born Jewish. Forums improvise psak. Between the two, the candidate is left alone with questions too heavy for an anonymous thread, and too personal for a “become Jewish” page. Shivim teaches; it does not rule.